Comments for Intelligent Disobedience http://mindavation.com/IDBlog A Blog about the difference between good and GREAT leaders Tue, 28 Feb 2012 22:24:04 -0500 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.1-RC1 Comment on An Intelligent Disobedience New Year’s Resolution by Daniel http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2012/01/an-intelligent-disobedience-new-years-resolution/#comment-14484 Daniel Tue, 28 Feb 2012 22:24:04 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2012/01/#comment-14484 I actually made a resolution to 'no longer accept the unacceptable' no matter the authority it comes from. It's a bit vague, but I know what it means, and I think you've defined it very nicely. What is deemed to be unacceptable is entirely defined by one's own sense of ethics or morality, therefore not accepting it, or pushing back, is a statement of self. There were a number of 'stupidities' that I conceded to in 2011 that I wish I didn't. It takes a lot of effort to disagree, but I'd rather have gone to the effort than accepted the decisions. I was, however, accused of being arrogant by my boss at some point last year, so I must have been doing something right. I actually made a resolution to ‘no longer accept the unacceptable’ no matter the authority it comes from. It’s a bit vague, but I know what it means, and I think you’ve defined it very nicely. What is deemed to be unacceptable is entirely defined by one’s own sense of ethics or morality, therefore not accepting it, or pushing back, is a statement of self.

There were a number of ‘stupidities’ that I conceded to in 2011 that I wish I didn’t. It takes a lot of effort to disagree, but I’d rather have gone to the effort than accepted the decisions. I was, however, accused of being arrogant by my boss at some point last year, so I must have been doing something right.

]]> Comment on An Intelligent Disobedience New Year’s Resolution by Georgia http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2012/01/an-intelligent-disobedience-new-years-resolution/#comment-14464 Georgia Tue, 24 Jan 2012 11:34:48 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2012/01/#comment-14464 Thank you! I have just rejected a project because I disagreed with the fundamental idea and felt uncomfortable managing that project, so this reinforcement was exactly what I needed. Our project management software and our skills should be used to do things that we believe in, and things that we hope will make the world a better place. Thank you! I have just rejected a project because I disagreed with the fundamental idea and felt uncomfortable managing that project, so this reinforcement was exactly what I needed. Our project management software and our skills should be used to do things that we believe in, and things that we hope will make the world a better place.

]]> Comment on Arguments are OK, but Technique is Important by Bob McGannon http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2010/11/arguments-are-ok-but-technique-is-important/#comment-2374 Bob McGannon Thu, 02 Dec 2010 04:13:39 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/?p=25#comment-2374 Hi Karen, When these discussions involve a friendship, the emotion can make this more difficult. When you were friends, did you have to "manage" her? That should be a determining factor as to the "worth" for you going forward. As in any discussion, I believe authenticity serves us best, whether it is a business or personal matter. If you authentically want to rekindle your friendship - you can reply to her "surprise" with a response - discussing what you felt, want to feel and hope to share with her again. If she is willing, that authenticity may just help - if not, she probably wasn't as good a friend as you might have hoped. This sort of thing happens in the business world as well- at times we may want a more productive relationship, but others do not respond. In those cases, we need to provide rationale as to the benefit the relationship may bring. Something to consider for yourself or when you reach out to another to extend (or mend) a relationship - is there worth, and if so, how can I share that worth in an effective way. Hi Karen,
When these discussions involve a friendship, the emotion can make this more difficult. When you were friends, did you have to “manage” her? That should be a determining factor as to the “worth” for you going forward.
As in any discussion, I believe authenticity serves us best, whether it is a business or personal matter. If you authentically want to rekindle your friendship – you can reply to her “surprise” with a response – discussing what you felt, want to feel and hope to share with her again. If she is willing, that authenticity may just help – if not, she probably wasn’t as good a friend as you might have hoped.
This sort of thing happens in the business world as well- at times we may want a more productive relationship, but others do not respond. In those cases, we need to provide rationale as to the benefit the relationship may bring. Something to consider for yourself or when you reach out to another to extend (or mend) a relationship – is there worth, and if so, how can I share that worth in an effective way.

]]> Comment on Arguments are OK, but Technique is Important by Karen http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2010/11/arguments-are-ok-but-technique-is-important/#comment-2324 Karen Mon, 29 Nov 2010 00:36:45 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/?p=25#comment-2324 I'm very interested in the practicality of this. While I understand it, I know that I'm not particularly confident about being effective in this area. To illustrate a recent example of this (unfortunately not work related, but similar structurally) I found an old friend on facebook and sent her a message. She had interrupted a phone conversation one day, saying she would call me back when the interruption was dealt with, and never did. She also never returned one of my calls again. It was impossible to resolve this situation then and I didn't really understand what was behind it. That was 8 years ago, and I thought perhaps it would nice to see if time had healed anything. After several days, I received a reply which, while it wasn't outright aggressive it wasn't warm either. She said she was surprised to hear from me after I'd gotten upset with her for a transgression and stopped talking to her. She also mentioned that she'd lost her best friend a long time ago and missed her ever since, 'but hey that's life'. A bit of a yell and leave in a way. So I'm in a quandry about how to respond effectively. My goal would be to reinstate our friendship, but with every response I formulate, I convince myself that it's not worth the effort based on the evidence in her response to my enquiry. (I suppose my fear in this situation would be that I would have to MANAGE her all the time, and a friendship needs to inspire you a little doesn't it?) I think if I'm honest I'm having trouble quelling a knee-jerk response of withdrawal and I'd like to hear from anyone who has a comment or advice about how to be brave enough to respond effectively in a situation that twanges your emotional strings. I've run into enough of them at work, and I think that I could have been more effective than I was. cheers Karen I’m very interested in the practicality of this. While I understand it, I know that I’m not particularly confident about being effective in this area.

To illustrate a recent example of this (unfortunately not work related, but similar structurally) I found an old friend on facebook and sent her a message. She had interrupted a phone conversation one day, saying she would call me back when the interruption was dealt with, and never did. She also never returned one of my calls again. It was impossible to resolve this situation then and I didn’t really understand what was behind it. That was 8 years ago, and I thought perhaps it would nice to see if time had healed anything.

After several days, I received a reply which, while it wasn’t outright aggressive it wasn’t warm either. She said she was surprised to hear from me after I’d gotten upset with her for a transgression and stopped talking to her. She also mentioned that she’d lost her best friend a long time ago and missed her ever since, ‘but hey that’s life’. A bit of a yell and leave in a way.

So I’m in a quandry about how to respond effectively. My goal would be to reinstate our friendship, but with every response I formulate, I convince myself that it’s not worth the effort based on the evidence in her response to my enquiry. (I suppose my fear in this situation would be that I would have to MANAGE her all the time, and a friendship needs to inspire you a little doesn’t it?) I think if I’m honest I’m having trouble quelling a knee-jerk response of withdrawal and I’d like to hear from anyone who has a comment or advice about how to be brave enough to respond effectively in a situation that twanges your emotional strings. I’ve run into enough of them at work, and I think that I could have been more effective than I was.

cheers
Karen

]]> Comment on The Multi-tasking Myth by Karen Henry http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2010/07/the-multi-tasking-myth/#comment-1485 Karen Henry Mon, 11 Oct 2010 02:51:03 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/?p=21#comment-1485 The only things that I believe you can multitask with are tasks that required different types of attention. In a meeting the sort of attention required is (to my mind) vigilance, which people are not particularly good at. This means that we need to monitor the progress of what is going on around us in case we need to think about it or respond to it. Surprisingly, I feel as though I am better at this sort of task when I am doing something that is repetitive and automatic, for example knitting. A small amount of my mind is taken up or distracted by the knitting task, that is distracted from the discomforts of the vigilance task. I have always found lectures, workshops and meetings difficult (physically) to sit through, I suppose because I'm not fully engaged. I then feel as though I am paying better attention to the flow of the meeting, because it doesn't seem as boring. This all goes quite well until something happens which requires full attention, for example I drop a stitch! Then I haven't got a clue what is said until I'm back to autopilot with the knitting. I agree that tasks that require the same level of cognition are impossible to do at the same time. However, mothers with toddlers would implode if they could literally do two things at once. I can tidy my desk while I discuss something on the phone with someone, even making low-level decisions about the tidying (should I keep this or bin it?), but that comes to a standstill the more I have to focus on my side of the conversation, for example if I have to construct a complex argument or point. I believe that it is possible to train your mind a little to focus on several things at once - I have in mind the Nintendo ds Brain Training game where three different voices are saying three different words at the same time and you must write all three words down. You can replay them, so initially everyone focuses on one word/voice until they get that, and then tunes that out and focuses on the next. However there are never enough repetitions for that, so eventually to beat the game you must focus on all three and let your brain sort it out for you. Is this heightened ability the sort of thing that is expected of us in today's workplace? I can always tell when collegues or friends of mine have huge workload from the state of their emails - spelling mistakes, crazy syntax and the inability to notice that anything is wrong with what they have written. I know then that their brains are churning with task completion, time management, politics and strategy, but I also wonder which ball they may drop if that is how they are communicating..... The only things that I believe you can multitask with are tasks that required different types of attention. In a meeting the sort of attention required is (to my mind) vigilance, which people are not particularly good at. This means that we need to monitor the progress of what is going on around us in case we need to think about it or respond to it. Surprisingly, I feel as though I am better at this sort of task when I am doing something that is repetitive and automatic, for example knitting. A small amount of my mind is taken up or distracted by the knitting task, that is distracted from the discomforts of the vigilance task. I have always found lectures, workshops and meetings difficult (physically) to sit through, I suppose because I’m not fully engaged. I then feel as though I am paying better attention to the flow of the meeting, because it doesn’t seem as boring.
This all goes quite well until something happens which requires full attention, for example I drop a stitch! Then I haven’t got a clue what is said until I’m back to autopilot with the knitting.
I agree that tasks that require the same level of cognition are impossible to do at the same time. However, mothers with toddlers would implode if they could literally do two things at once. I can tidy my desk while I discuss something on the phone with someone, even making low-level decisions about the tidying (should I keep this or bin it?), but that comes to a standstill the more I have to focus on my side of the conversation, for example if I have to construct a complex argument or point. I believe that it is possible to train your mind a little to focus on several things at once – I have in mind the Nintendo ds Brain Training game where three different voices are saying three different words at the same time and you must write all three words down. You can replay them, so initially everyone focuses on one word/voice until they get that, and then tunes that out and focuses on the next. However there are never enough repetitions for that, so eventually to beat the game you must focus on all three and let your brain sort it out for you. Is this heightened ability the sort of thing that is expected of us in today’s workplace?
I can always tell when collegues or friends of mine have huge workload from the state of their emails – spelling mistakes, crazy syntax and the inability to notice that anything is wrong with what they have written. I know then that their brains are churning with task completion, time management, politics and strategy, but I also wonder which ball they may drop if that is how they are communicating…..

]]> Comment on The Multi-tasking Myth by Stan Yanakiev, PMP http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2010/07/the-multi-tasking-myth/#comment-751 Stan Yanakiev, PMP Wed, 18 Aug 2010 08:51:35 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/?p=21#comment-751 This is a good post. I have met people who genuinely believe they are good at multitasking (better than me) and people who multitask while sitting in long meetings. I have always believed that power of the brain comes when focusing on one thing at a time and it is nice to see scientific evidence that supports that. And obviously multitasking is not the solution to long boring meetings... This is a good post. I have met people who genuinely believe they are good at multitasking (better than me) and people who multitask while sitting in long meetings. I have always believed that power of the brain comes when focusing on one thing at a time and it is nice to see scientific evidence that supports that. And obviously multitasking is not the solution to long boring meetings…

]]> Comment on Let\’s Share Stories on Intelligent Disobedience by Bob McGannon http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/2009/06/lets-share-stories-on-intelligent-disobedience/#comment-4 Bob McGannon Mon, 29 Jun 2009 13:38:03 +0000 http://mindavation.com/IDBlog/?p=3#comment-4 For those reader in Perth, we are presenting another edition of our Intelligent Disobedience class on July 30th and 31st. Send an email to info@mindavation.com or visit the Red Horizon Events website at www.redhorizonevents.com.au for information and to enrol. For those reader in Perth, we are presenting another edition of our Intelligent Disobedience class on July 30th and 31st. Send an email to info@mindavation.com or visit the Red Horizon Events website at http://www.redhorizonevents.com.au for information and to enrol.

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